Monday, January 30, 2006

My Sunny Disposition

So I'm tired, I'm cranky and to be honest... Very annoyed. Thank you so much to those of you out there that sent me messages and comments yesterday they mean more to me than I can express. And to those of you who didn't well pfffbbbbt on you then... grin... Ahhh the subtle maturity of the raspberry spittle. And to think a couple of days ago I was bragging about my maturity.... grin. So after I got off work this morning at 7 something I was reminded that I had to attend a mandatory Bar-B-Que . I don't know where they got the meat (which now that I think about it, bothers me more than I thought it did.) Back in the states we call it "mandatory Fun" Over here it is mainly just an intrusion. It wasn't really that bad, my only complaint was that it severely hampered my sleeping... So I am currently running on a little more than three and a half hours of sleep. Which explains my sunny disposition... Or the lack there of anyway. During the party we played a game of spades which much to my dismay turned into three games of Spades. At least we won two out of three which isn't all that bad considering my track record. We play a lot of Spades out here. So another factor in my less then pleasant mood is the fact that the people that are in charge of dispensing our mail decided that they didn't feel the need to pass it out today. Which in translation means we get our mail when they are damn good and ready. Stupid people that abuse positions of power. Grrr Arrrgh!

Random Fact of the day:

Every single one of you started out as a girl... (Yes even you "Barbie") Which is the reason men have nipples... well that and think how odd we would look with out them...

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Today In History (part 2)

I almost titled this blog as Me! Me! Me! LOL
So among other things today marks the Chinese New year from what I gather it is a revolving day similar to that of Thanksgiving or other such days...Oh yeah and it is my birthday as well so whoopee or whatever. First and foremost I want to say thank you to Grams & and Gramps. I received their Birthday package on Friday. I have been using the noise makers to annoy many people around here. So I have planned for this blog to be similar to the one that I wrote for Gramps on his birthday... along with some other things that I have been researching. So Today in History:

January 29th in History
1802: John James Beckley is appointed the first librarian of the Library of Congress.
1834: President Jackson orders first use of US troops to suppress a labor dispute
1845: Edgar Allen Poe's "The Raven" first published in New York.
1861: Kansas becomes the 34th state...
1904: First athletic letters given: to University of Chicago football team.
1933: German President von Hindenburg makes big mistake, appoints Hitler chancellor
1955: William Cox buys Yankee Stadium.
1958: Charles Starkweather captured by police in Wyoming...
1969: Britain refused entry into the European Economic Community
1978: Sweden is the first country to introduce a law banning the use of aerosol sprays harmful to the ozone layer.
1986: 19.380 million shares traded in the New York Stock Exchange.

After reading those I realize that my birthday really doesn't inspire great moments of history (sorry Kansas) There are a few famous people that share my birthday as well:

In 1737 Thomas Paine, political essayist
In 1756 Henry (Light Horse Harry) Lee, cavalryman
In 1823 Franklin Gardner, Confederate major general, Fought at Shiloh and Port Hudson
In 1843 William McKinley, 25th President (1897-1901)
In 1850 Lawrence Hargrave, invented the box kite
In 1860 Anton Chekhov (in Russia), writer (The Cherry Orchard)
In 1874 John D. Rockefeller Jr, financier, founded University of Chicago
In 1880 William Claude Dukenfield (better known as W.C. Fields), comedian
In 1901 Allen B. DuMont, perfected the first commercially practical cathode ray tube
In 1915 Victor Mature, actor In 1918 John Forsythe, actor
In 1939 Germaine Greer, (in Melbourne, Australia)
In 1942 Claudine Longet (in France), actor
In 1943 Katharine Ross (in Hollywood, CA)
In 1945 Tom Selleck (in Detroit, MI), actor (Magnum, PI; Lassiter)
In 1951 Ann Jillian, (in Cambridge, MA), actor
In 1954 Oprah Winfrey, actor, television host
In 1958 Judy Norton-Taylor (in Santa Monica, CA), actor (The Waltons)
In 1985 Athina Onassis

So there are 18 people that I have never met that share with me one day, Kind of silly huh? There have been quite a few birthdays around here the past couple of weeks and I know of at least two or three more in the coming weeks so I want to say Happy Birthday to everyone. Haji, Barbie, RFG, Me (see I'm important as well) And the man with the Big V8 (sort of a private joke) and I guess I should mention the Lt as well... sigh.

So I had some time on my hands earlier and I did some calculations these are by no means exact but by using common averages i.e. an average of eight hours of sleep a night an 8 hour school day for 9 months for 14 years ... 3 hours per day on meals... and a 10 hour work day over 11 years and this is what I came up with... I have spent:

8 years, 6 months 4 days 2 hours and 9 minutes sleeping
2 years 4 months 8 days 7 hours and 6 minutes at school
6 years 7 months 1 day 2 hours and 32 minutes at work.
3 years, 2 months, 4 days 10 hours and 9 and a half minutes eating
Which after adding them all together accounts for:
20 years 7 months 17 days 21 hours 56 and a half minutes

So here is my question what was I doing with the remaining time...? Have I really spent almost 5 and a half years doing nothing? How depressing is that thought? I was going to add how much time I have spent watching movies but if I divulged that information you all would think that I never worked.

So here is the Rub Birthdays come and go. I just find myself wondering if I don't put too much into them. Growing up I waited all year for it and was almost always disappointed by the day. (with two major exceptions my 13th Birthday my sister threw a surprise birthday party and then 4 years later some friends from church through a surprise party for my seventeenth. Both were unexpected and greatly appreciated.) The Past 5 years my birthday is usually the last thing on my mind... on my 21st I went to a bar and ordered my first drink, on the way home I learned a friend of mine died in an accident on the way home from the bar. And the four years following that I was in the military whether I was training or just working it never failed that I ended up on my birthday alone. I am not trying to inspire pity or someone to feel sorry for me. I just wonder why I look forward to the almost guaranteed disappointment every year.... weird huh?

Random Fact of the blog...
My Birthday is 35 days after Christmas, 28 days After New Years and always on the same day of week as those holidays. And My 18th Birthday is the only year that the Super bowl was celebrated on the same day...

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Haunting Mistakes

And the world comes crashing down. Something is bothering RFG and I think that if my history was different he would be talking to me. I made a mistake a very long time ago that has quietly affected my life in different ways. I would go more into detail but I am much more fond of people thinking that I am as good as I try to be. Everyone makes mistakes some bigger than others. I am no different than anyone else. Although I do love to put on a show. The thing that bothers me is that now that a good friend of mine needs my help, he wont talk to me. And I think it is because of that one mistake. We have talked about it before and to him no one can do anything more low.
In lighter matters Iraq is experiencing a very wet rainy season our little Camp Scania is currently nothing more than a large mud puddle. Which just makes it so much fun to walk around at night. Can you feel the sarcasm dripping from my words? So this going to be short again because all I have done is sleep today. Although I have been dreaming about an Asian friend of mine alot recently... Haven't heard from her in a while I must be worried about her.

Random fact of the Day:
Everyone makes mistakes; the only thing that matters is that we learn from them so that we don't repeat them.
- James Brooks and I'm sure like a hundred others before me.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Show Your Work (part 3)

I have come across a little more math and of course I had to share it with you. So here you go.

For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job, earwax build-up, poor blood or anything else I could think of. But now I found out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked. Here's why. . .
The population of this country is 273 million. 140 million are retired.
That leaves 133 million to do the work. There are 85 million in school.
Which leaves 48 million to do the work. Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government.
Leaving 19 million to do the work. 2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama Bin-Laden.
Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work. Take from that total the 14.8 million people who work for state and city governments.
And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work. At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.
Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work. Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me. And there you are sitting on your ass, at your computer, reading jokes. Nice. Real nice.

So I finally gave in and read The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown. I have been putting it off because everyone has been saying how good it is, I was so afraid that I wouldn't like it. But it turns out... It is damn good. In other news from here on out The Sexy Idahoan will hitherto be known as Barbie. it's kind of a long story but the long and short of it is: A while back our group was watching Scrubs (If you haven't seen it you should definitely check it out. it is nothing short of hilarious...) As I have mentioned a couple of times before each person in our group shares traits with a character in the show... (My self and the main character J.D. The Mexican would be Turk. RFG is with out a doubt Dr Cox The Hajji is Dr. kelso and The Sexy Idahoan is without a doubt Elliot the blonde doctor better known as Barbie) So why do we only change Barbie's name? Yesterday we were talking about our friends and Scrubs and we were trying to figure out who The Idahoan most resembled and they had the most in common and mainly because it really makes him angry. He almost hit me like eight times today... LOL I think I have some kind of masochistic death wish. It is so much fun to get him all steamed up... Which turns out to make me think I'm not such a good person. Oh and we are like the worst friends ever. Last night Barbie told us his birthday was last Thursday. I feel like a complete heel. Especially since the reason we found out at all was that I was whining about how my birthday was going to come and go with out so much as a how do you do. Barbie basically said yeah I know how that is. Yep I'm a jerk! But at least I am a jerk with a good heart right??? Right???

Random Fact of the day:
David Rice Atchinson was President of the United States for exactly one day. This happened due to a glitch in American law at the time. When James Polk left his elected office as President. While he departed on the appointed day, it was a Sunday, and Zachary Taylor was unable to take the oath of office that day. According to law, Rice as the pro tempore leader of the Senate, took office for the whole day, and left without either regret, or a pension, on Monday.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

The Stupid Things I Say...

Surprise! Surprise! I said something stupid today. And get this I was naked when I said it.... Yep you read that correctly... I was all naked. And get this... I wasn't the only naked male in the room when I said the stupid thing. So let me paint the picture for you I had just stepped out of a very long shower... (See when I go at odd hours I get to take long hot showers that feel soooo very good,) and as I was starting to get dressed I sort of stumbled and almost fell. The guy next to me laughed and I said "Sometimes I am klutzier than a virgin on prom night." Remember a while back when I talked about the things that guys are not supposed to do in the bathroom... Things like talking making jokes or looking at each other. Well this goes double for shower rooms. I don't even really know why I said it. I heard it in my head before I said it. And I said it anyway. Very very stupid. Everyone in the shower room kind of gave a nervous laugh and then left as quickly as they possibly could have. Except for me. I continued to get dressed and then did all my girly man personal hygiene stuff... It is quite possible that I could be the largest freak on the planet.

On a completely different subject of conversation every night at work we sit around and try to come up with topics to discuss in detail. Last night’s topic? What would you do if four of your closest friends were involved in some terrible tragedy and you were only given the opportunity to save one? Now here is my problem. I had to choose between six of my closest friends I honestly don't think I could do it with out a completely random pull a name out of a hat sort of thing. I know that no matter who I chose I would constantly wonder if I had made the wrong decision. How do you decide who lives and who dies. In my situation of the six of my friends two have a child and a spouse. Does that make them more important than the other four? And then I started wondering if because I have a slight crush on one of them would I for the rest of my life wonder if my bias hurt someone else. Do you see why I am single? Do you have any idea how difficult it is to hide the crazy that is my inner thoughts??? One can hardly imagine a young woman falling for a man that is so very crazy... (He he he ha ha ha I actually referred to myself as a man... now we know I am crazy.)

Random Retarded Scientist of the Blog:
A scientist who weighed people immediately before and after death concluded that the human soul weighs 21 grams. So my question is did he kill the subject? I mean how did he weigh him Directly before and after??? Any Ideas????

Friday, January 20, 2006

The Necronomicon Of Fatty Books

So RFG has decided (Along with a few of the higher ups) that I am not paranoid enough by what I consume… In order to help further my psychosis I have started a calorie counting journal… I call it Brooks’ Fatty Counting Book… And true to form I have become almost obsessed with knowing exactly how many calories I am consuming so that I might transcribe it into what is sure to become the Necronomicon of Fat Books … as it turns out over the past three days I have been averaging a little less than 1200 hundred calories a day…. Let me tell you… Counting calories is very, very depressing… at a normal breakfast I have about a cup of cereal (usually Raisin Bran Crunch or honey Nut Cheerios..) some skimmed milk a Blueberry muffin and a Gatorade… (Remember I am on to the gym after breakfast it is always important to remember to hydrate your self trough out the day…) any way that all comes to about 670 calories… most of which is from that damn muffin.. how can something that taste so very yummy be so very fattening???? So RFG The SI and I started a new XBOX game today… it isn’t really anything to write home about except that we are all playing on the same screen so some minor hi jinx usually ensue… Anyway I’m very tired so I’m gonna cut this one short… hope you all have a splendid weekend..

Random Fact of the Blog:

Reno, Nevada is actually west of Los Angeles, Ca… no really I looked it up…

Oh and another odd Idahoan Law…. It is against the law to NOT smile in Pocatello, Idaho… Silly Spudsters….

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Show Your Work (part 2)

I thought you all might like some more math problems:

Romance Mathematics

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + Smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + Dumb woman =pregnancy

Office Arithmetic

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

Shopping Math

A man will pay $20 for $10 item he needs
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.

General Equations & Statistics

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

Propensity To Change

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

So yeah if you hadn't noticed I couldn't think of anything to write about... so I am thinking that I might not be posting as often as I have been... I promise to post when ever I have anything to say. I just don't want this to become stale you know? So not to much has happened here in the past few days... except there was this nasty guy in the gym today who reeked to high heaven. He was on the Tread mill between RFG and I today.... he was so gross... he made us gag... I don't understand why so many people out here have such a problem with bathing... Although as cold as the shower that I took today was. ( And it was oh so very cold) I guess I can understand it to a point, Oh yeah before I forget everyone should go out right now and rent the movie 11:14 It really is an awesome movie... It tells the story of how five people’s lives interact and come together at one moment one faithful night. Very very good movie.. so go, go out and rent... There are some huge names in it... such as Patrick Swayze... Rachel Leigh Cook.. Colin Hanks (Tom Hanks' son) and Ben Foster... Looks do your self a favor and go rent it... at most you will lose 95 minutes of boredom.....

Random facts of the Blog.
In Idaho it is illegal to give someone a box of candy that weighs more than 50 pounds... I don't know why but that struck me as freaking hillarious.... Although come to think of it every person from Idaho that I know is very skinny... The Sexy Idahoan for example... That kid is a bean pole.

The word "Tips" is actually an acronym - To Insure Prompt Service... so then why do we only leave tips at the end of the meal????

Monday, January 16, 2006

The Why Question

Life is for all intents and purposes supposed to be a mystery right? So why is it that I spend a majority of my life trying to answer the why question. I mean don't get me wrong I don’t think I could be me with out my ever so persistent need to know more but where is the line? At what point is the knowledge that I (or we for that matter) have gained enough? Is there such thing as enough or too much knowledge? For as long as I can remember I have questioned everything... I know that every young child asks questions. It just seems that I never moved on from that point in my life. I don't know if that makes any sense. But it is what I am thinking about... So a couple of people have told me that my blog is lacking zing... my only reply to these comments is eh... deal with it. See the long and short of it is this blog is for my benefit. It is solely an outlet so that I don't go insane and yell at some poor unsuspecting private or hajji... or NCO....Or you know anyone that could have a detrimental effect on my career. I am truly happy that so many people read my blog. I would be lying if I said I didn’t want you to read it. But I honestly want you to know that I write it for me... If I could put into the writing the weight that is lifted off of my shoulders every time I post on this blog it would fill volumes. I don't know why but writing has always been a release for me, Gramps I do read the comments and I appreciate the compliment you gave me. Normally I have a hard time when people compliment me in any way. But especially when they compliment my writing. It wasn't until I served in Iraq my first term that I started making a regular attempt to share my writings with the masses... I have to admit it is an awesome feeling knowing that strangers that you will never meet face to face are reading your thoughts and musings. I knew then that I would truly love to be a writer... And as it turns out I am trying to actually write a book write now... Well sort of anyway... It isn't nearly as easy as one would think... I can tell you that I am trying... and that like me, my main character has an insatiable need to answer the Why question. So here is hoping that a year or so from now you will be picking up the first novel by A.J. James Brooks... who knows maybe there is a little mystery after all.

Random Quotes of the blog....
Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth! -Anne Tyler

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. -Robert A. Heinlein

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. -Rita Rudner

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Playing Army...

Today’s blog is something like 14 hours late, my apologies. I was tired... It turns out there was quite a bit of excitement yesterday... I found out the day before yesterday that we were going to have an attack drill. (similar to fire or earthquake drills except instead of hiding underneath our desks or running out side to an open area, we run out side to a bunker and wait for the all clear.) That is unless you’re a CLS (combat life saver) like me and a few others then you run to the mayors cell and wait until you are needed by the medics. It could have been fun, we could have played doctor (hmmm it could of been a lot of fun) on people pretending to be injured... but instead we just sat and waited.... and waited.... and waited... and then we went back to our tent. Apparently the Drill only entailed 3 victims so the need for excess personnel was not necessary... Boring, anyway while RFG and the Sexy Idahoan were at work last night they got to play firefighters.... I don't know all the details... But apparently the generator blew a piston or whatever... and caught fire... So they put it out and had the nice KBR people come out and do what they could to repair it. So that’s like the second time in as many weeks that RFG and SI have had power issues while they were at work. Luckily the nice KBR people fix the problem before I have to go to work... so yay them. Apparently RFG came back to our tent after the fire to get things like flashlights and other things to help keep the darkness inducing boredom at bay. I found out this morning that RFG was talking to me and told me what had happened but I don't remember any of it... apparently I was sitting up, asking questions and that’s about it... the way he described I looked as though I had been drugged. Swaying in a sort of haze. RFG told me to go back to sleep...and so I did..shrug. On a completely different subject how long should one wait for a reply to an email?? I mean if you’re corresponding with someone on a semi regular basis two days or so should be plenty of time correct??? Don't misunderstand I myself understand that people are busy... And to be honest I am not exactly known for my timely responses. I just wonder if someone doesn't write you back after a certain amount of time if it should be considered a polite brush off. Or if there is a known waiting period that I am as of yet unaware. For the record I did not imply there was anything wrong with Louisiana women. The intent in comment was that I might one day find a woman who lives in Louisiana that I might marry. My Apologies if there was some kind of misunderstanding. So I have decided against going on midtour leave this time around. I was originally scheduled to go in may but as it is only fourteen days and nearly impossible to plan anything as the exact dates are not final until you are actual already on leave... (Due mainly to the utter lack of ability to leave on anything more than standby out of Kuwait) The problem is that there are no set flights out you could be waiting as many as four days just to get out of the country... which can play havoc with plans like a cruise or flight to Jamaica or Europe or what ever. Ironically when your coming back from leave it takes like no time to get you back to Iraq... what kind of janky system is that?? (Apparently Janky is new slang for whack... I am so hip)

Random (and even unnecessary) fact of the blog:
The Rubik's Cube was invented in 1974 by Professor Erno Rubik as a teaching aid for students at the Hungarian Academy of Crafts and Design in Budapest. Since hitting stores in 1980 more than two hundred and fifty million Rubik’s cubes have been sold, making it the best selling toy of all time. At 12.11 seconds Japans’ Shotaro Makisumi holds the world Rubik's Cube solving record. He also holds the record for the only man in the Guinness Book of World Records to not get laid... grin

Thursday, January 12, 2006

A Gym Dandy Realization!

This is the Fifty first blog I have posted so masltov ! Or something. (I'm so not Jewish) So I guess I should mention that "Off Limits" is back in town. I found out she was back by her walking into the gym during my work out yesterday. As she walked in I dropped the bar bell I was holding. And almost lost my toe in the process. Here is the kicker, seeing as everyone here thinks I’m madly in love with her. (It is a crush people nothing more.... I don't know the first thing about her.) There are a couple of people who are trying to get her to talk to me. It isn't as though I don't appreciate it, I do really. I just don't think I am meant to meet the woman I am going to marry in Iraq. For all I know she lives in Louisiana... (More on that at a later date.) Have you ever known someone that was really easy to annoy... No that isn't the right word. Someone who had buttons that were I don’t know out there for everyone to push? I have a friend that for some reason I can not stop pushing his buttons. He is a good kid. He is just so easily poked and prodded. I feel bad after I do it. (I would feel bad when I did it but usually I’m busy laughing.) I just can't stop pushing him. And I really don't know why. Does that make me a bad person? Okay I wanted to talk about something else, but for the life of me I can not think of what it was. RFG just walked in and reminded me what it was I wanted to talk about. Today I was in the gym and I was looking at myself in the mirror (I hate that I do that even more now than I used to. (Which was, to be honest, alot to begin with) it isn't that I’m narcissistic or anything I'm just looking to find what someone else might see... does that make sense? Anyway I was looking in the mirror and I realized that my right arm is bigger than my left. (Please keep all masturbating jokes to the minimum thank you...) They are both muscular but for obvious reasons my left arm is noticeably smaller... So yeah I look like a freak. At least I am a buff freak. Hmmm about that

Random Fact of the blog:
Montpelier, Vermont, is the only US state capital without a McDonald’s. So the obese people there have nothing to blame except TV, delicious cheese flavored snacks (a personal favorite of mine), other fast-food joints.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained

Happy Birthday AGW I am so sorry I forgot to mention you in my last blog....Grandpa I would also like to apologize to you. I misunderstood the actual date of your birthday and I apologize. If you want both you and your friends can flog me with a cat o'nine tails when I get back home. I am a bad person and I am sorry. So as I am sure you all know by now... the Bengal’s lost. 17-31 Steelers... sigh... So I paid the Sexy Idahoan. Obviously I was sulking. So yeah this morning SI asked me if I wanted to bet against the Steelers again this week... I told him football is dead to me. Is that bad sportsmanship? Eh what ever... So my whole not sleeping caught up with me today... When I came back from breakfast I laid down to stretch a little bit... That was at about eight this morning... I woke up around four thirty this afternoon.... that’s like eight and a half hours... So now I am wide awake... although I don't have a lot to talk about. I have a question... How many of you make your bed right when you get up in the morning? I mean literally wake up and start straightening the blankets... I do that on a normal basis and today I realized I was doing it despite the obvious pee dance that I was performing. Do you have any idea how difficult it is to make your bed when you have to pee??? And it isn't like the bathroom is just across the hall from me. The closest restroom is at lest 200 feet from here.... and the one that I prefer to use is more than twice that. so instead of waking up and walking like a normal person to the bathroom ... I make my bed (with its oh so cool Spiderman bed set) and than I do the pee dance all the way to the bathroom where at least once, someone will stop me and want to talk about something completely inconsequential (when you have to pee everything is inconsequential) As I mentioned before I have been watching Charmed for the past couple of days. And the more I think about it the more I wish I had some kind of mental power like telekinesis or the ability to freeze time (when I brought this up around here I learned that most people would abuse the power to freeze time to use it for their benefit. i.e. gambling, cheating in some form or another.) has there ever been an ability that you wished you had that you thought would make your day better??? I have wanted to be able to freeze time ever since that girl Evie could do it on Out of this world... I haven’t seen that show in like years and still the theme song is stuck in my head (Would you like to swing on a star, or carry moon beams home in a jar... or would you rather live on earth.) You know one day I am going to wake up and realize that fiction is just that and boy am I going to be bummed....

Random fact of the Blog:
Congressional and Nobel Prize Winners' medals are made of solid gold, Olympic gold medals are gold plated silver... And suddenly everyone understands Tonya Harding just a little better....

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Tests & Time Management

I wonder sometimes if I am being tested. It seems that I am constantly falling into situations that push me to my wits end. The first example is small and sort of petty. But eh what can you do… I don’t know if you are aware but while we are in Iraq we have to carry our weapons around with us everywhere we go. In order to help make this just a little bit easier we have a shoulder strap,( or sling) in which case normally we just carry our weapon slung over our back…. For some unknown reason my sling is constantly coming undone… and usually in a loud crashing noise kind of way.. Especially If it happens to be late at night on my night off and I am trying to walk through my tent with out disturbing anyone… long story short I have tried a lot of different ways to solve this problem and nothing has worked. RFG has suggested that I tape it… But to be honest it just doesn’t look nice with tape all over your weapon, you know? (the word I’ve grown fond of using is Icky) as I said small and petty.
Recently I have been accused of not managing my time well... I work 12 hour shifts every thirty six hours. Which means that I should have an ample amount of time to do things like sleep, write my blog, write my emails, watch what ever movie catches my fancy ( as I am writing this I am watching season 2 of Charmed ) eat, shower and go to the Gym. Now granted I do spend an obscene amount of time in the gym. In my defense the person accusing me of not managing my time is the reason I am in the gym for so long. (Today I was in the gym for four hours straight. How sick is that?) Anyway for some reason I can't seem to sleep. I should have the time but it always seems to get all befuddled... (I really like that word) Mainly I think it comes from the fact that I am always trying to do something that isn't necessary. (Such as pine after an MWR Employee like "Off Limits") Or spending large sums of money on DVD's I will probably only watch once in the entire year that I’ll be Here.... That reminds me as of the sixth of this month we have completed the first quarter of our year long tour of the SandBox. Only nine months to go! Wahoo! So the Sexy Idahoan and I put a little wager on the Bengal’s-Steelers game tonight (20 bucks to the winner) we tried to get RFG in on it but he said no. I am really hoping that they win... I don't need the money but the "Sexy Idahoan" has been talking smack all day long about how the Steelers are just going to wipe the field with the Bengal’s... And well I just have to hold on to hope that my precious Cinci Bengal’s will find what ever it is they have lost over the past two weeks. Like the ability to win a game. So despite my commitment to the gym, there are a few people who out rank me that don't think I am working hard enough. Translation they want me to do more.... Apparently some of my friends have been getting pressure to make sure I am doing everything in my power to be physically fit. Sigh what ever....

Random Fact Of The Blog:
Nintendo (as in the people who make the Gamecube console and the Gameboy portable game things) was founded in 1889, when they manufactured playing cards, and attempted to make Italians larger by feeding them mushrooms… let it simmer its funnier than you think

Friday, January 06, 2006

Today in History

First and Foremost I want to say Happy Birthday to Grandpa Fred he turns 70 years young today and I honestly think that is just absolutely amazing. As it turns out I have spent the past couple of days looking into significant happenings through out history that have happened on or around January 7th.especially within the last 70 years and I have decided that Today’s blog is dedicated to knowledge of our past. I completely believe if we don't learn from our past we will be doomed to repeat it... the Following are some tidbits that I have come across in my research...
1610: Galileo discovers the moons of Jupiter with his newly invented telescope1789: First national (Presidential) election in US1927: The first telephone service between London and New York begins operating1936: Fred Michaels is born in Chicago Illinois 1953: US President Truman announces development of the hydrogen bomb1975: The oil producing members of OPEC agree to raise prices by 10%1986: President Regan breaks off all economic links with Libya1990: Tower Of Pisa closed to the public after leaning too far
Another interesting thing I found out is that there is a supposed curse on presidents that serve during a twentieth year with the exception of George W, and Ronald Reagan every president serving a term during a 20 year mark has died while in office. Starting with George Washington in 1780 (There was an attempt to assassinate Reagan but he survived) I realize that isn't the happiest of thoughts but I thought it was mildly interesting. I have spent the past few nights at work with two guys who enjoy arguing about pretty much anything... Anyway last night a debate went on for over two hours on whether or not people actually want to succeed in their Dreams... (I.e... I want to be a novelist... Or I want to be President or I want to be a billionaire) Random side note at last count there are 691 Billionaires world wide according to Forbes magazine. The Haji claimed that women have dreams that they don’t want to ever see come to fruit... basicly in the end we got him to except that no one has a dream with out hoping that they might one day reach it... so I'm a spazz and went and bought like 6 movies just now... i've actually seen all but two of them I think.. How very odd am I??? And I bought a new game that allows me to terrorize a big city anyway I please... (According to the tag line at the bottom of the box) Good Marrow all

Random Fact of the Blog:
The Painting commonly known as The Mona Lisa is actually titled La Giaconda, after its subject, the wife of Francesco Del Giocondo... which makes me wonder why there is a common belief the painting was a self portrait of Leonardo Da vinci....hmmm

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Writers Block

So RFG received the following story in the mail yesterday and it made us laugh so I thought I would pass it along to all of you... please forgive any typos as I had to copy it from a hard copy.... soooo primitive... I apologize for the brief language...Warning! The following post is rated B-13 (Bloggers under the age of thirteen should have their parents read it to them) by the rating commission (that’s me!).

Two things Navy Seals Are Always taught:
1. Keep your priorities in order
2. Know when to act with out hesitation
A college professor, an avowed atheist and active in the ACLU (I had to look it up), was teaching his class. He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated that once and for all he was going to prove there was no God.
Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform... I'll give you exactly 15 minutes!!!!!
The lecture room fell silent. You could have heard a pin drop.
Ten minutes went by. "I'm waiting God, if your real knock me off this platform!!!"
Again after 4 minutes, the professor taunted God saying "Here I am God!!!! I’m still waiting!!!"
His countdown go to the last few seconds when a SEAL , just released from the Navy after serving in Afghanistan and Iraq and newly enrolled in the class, walked up to the professor. The SEAL hit him full force in the face, and sent the professor tumbling from his lofty platform. The Professor was out cold. The students were stunned and shocked.
They began to babble in confusion. The SEAL nonchalantly took his seat in the front row and sat silent. The class looked at him and fell silent....waiting.
Eventually the professor came to and was noticeably shaken. He looked at the Seal in the front row. When the professor regained his senses and could speak he asked "What the hell is the matter with you? Why did you do that?"
The SEAL replied "God was really busy, protecting America's soldiers, who are protecting your right to say stupid shit and act like an asshole, so he sent me!"

I apologize for some unknown reason I am suffering from some major Writers Block... This blog seems choppy I'll do my best next time. Aside from that not to much has gone on... RFG and I have decided to make a DVD of some photos and some music files. (A slide show shown with a song, if done right it turns out very awesome) It has actually been done already by Little "B" (a skinny kid with the same last name as me.) and the Hadji. They did a really good job. To Toby Keith’s American Soldier song... Long story short they left a couple of people out so we have decided we are going to make one that includes everyone. I think the truth of the matter is that it takes time to do it (a three minute song takes somewhere in the neighborhood of nine hours to complete) and one thing we love is anything to waste a few more hours. I mentioned a couple of days ago that some of the guys that went on leave this month are getting hosed as far as their living arrangements. Basically once you leave Scania you don't return. So today RFG and I packed a couple of the guys' stuff up in our tent. Now don't let yourself get too misty eyed our intentions were less than honorable. (We packed them up so we could usurp their space)... Now we have a living area that is almost twice the size. The Sexy Idahoan is finally back, he has the distinction of being the last soldier to be able to come back to Scania after leaving. I want to thank Miss Bradford from Louisiana she sent me a Christmas package as part of the adopt a soldier program and it was much appreciated. I saw the new American Pie Band Camp movie today. It was a lot better than I thought it would be. Although it has only one character from the original movies (Jim's Dad). Last night was probably the best work night I have had in a couple of weeks we messed around played cards watched movies and mocked all the very dim truckers that came through our site.

Random Fact of the Day: The Earth weighs around 6,588,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 tons. suddenly I feel soooo much better about myself how about you?

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

The Blog That Never Ends

Do you remember fighting when you were younger? I mean If you had siblings or close friends, one of you would disagree with the other, then he or she would push you, then one of you would throw a fist (at least this is how it usually went in my house when I was younger and in one argument or another with either one of my brothers or my step sister.) There is a not so subtle hierarchy that is in place depending on whether or not you’re the oldest and whether or not you’re the favorite. One of the oddest things that I had the most trouble adjusting to when I was growing up happened when I first met my Stepsister. I was ten and she was eleven. Up to that point I had been the oldest sibling in my family, when I met my father new family I went from being the oldest to being the middle child. Needless to say it took some minor adjustments... On the one hand it was kind of cool I was gaining a sister (not to mention yet another brother and a stepmother) which I had always wanted, and at the same time it was very daunting. You have to understand I was just as much an intrusion on their lives as I possibly could have been. I sort of unknowingly at the time shook the foundation of that family. There were a lot of arguments that I was pretty sure were because of me. And then, man, did my sister and I have some arguments... She could be the nicest person one second and one of the most evil the next. We lived in Oregon when I was fourteen and we were home schooled, which translates into we were around each other a lot... It doesn't matter who you are around for that amount of time at that age you are bound to argue and being siblings, arguing quickly turned into her kicking my butt. I'm not proud of it but the girl was strong. I mean my brothers and I would fight a lot and they too would beat me up. I was kind of a wimp as a kid. Come to think of it I’m still kind of a wimp. Except now I’m a wimp with awesome pectorals and great biceps, and my triceps look rather fetching... Oh and my back muscles are coming along nicely as well. Sorry I had to boost my ego up a little bit I was starting to feel a little bit like a wimp... go figure. But I digress, the point of today’s rant is that no one fights like that as an adult and I honestly think that we are worse for wear. Take for example, the other night some two bit jerk with an attitude that would take the shine off gold... (That’s the nice way of saying I wasn't to terribly impressed by his first impression) I had to yell at one of his soldiers because they were smoking on our site (A big no-no as our cargo is flammable As I was yelling at the first fool another lit up right in front of me. Needless to say it made me slightly irate... I threw some blue words at him (I cursed) and as I was chewing the half surprised mostly stupefied private a new hole in his posterior, the "two bit jerk" tried getting in my face. Long story short there was yelling and he left feeling very peeved. (I waved a very Miss America wave as they drove off... apparently this upset him further as he waved good bye with only one finger extended) The point is we both would of felt better if we would have had a chance to walk around the corner and dust each other up a little bit. As in adult I understand why this behavior is no longer acceptable and to be honest I am thankful (as I would probably get my arse handed to me on a semi regular basis...apparently some people are offended by my sense of humor. Go figure.) I don't want you to think that I condone violence; I am completely opposed to it. I just wish life was as simple as it was when I was ten or fourteen even. Even if we (my sister or any of my brothers and I) had had a fight that drug on for hours as soon as Mom or Dad came home it was over... (Usually an hour or so before so that redness and swelling would fade, no sense in leaving proof we were misbehaving right???) the point is the problem was gone... sure we'd probably find something to fight about the next day but for the time we were completely civil to each other.... I just wish that a few adults I knew could behave that well. So Nemesis you never did read my Blog you punk... and as for you Bubble Butt (You know who you are.) ... please let me know how you are doing...

Random fact of the day:
Why is the typewriter keyboard set up the way it is?
A Short History of QWERTY In 1867, Christopher Latham Sholes, a Milwaukee printer, filed a patent application for a mechanical writing machine. Unlike the manual typewriters you may remember from your youth, his machine had its typebars on the bottom, striking upward to leave an impression on the paper. This arrangement had two serious drawbacks. First, because the printing point was underneath the paper carriage, it was invisible to the typist. Second, if a typebar became jammed, it too, remained invisible to the operator. Sholes worked for the next six years to try to eliminate this problem, trying mechanical changes and different keyboard arrangements.
In 1873, E. Remington & Sons licensed the design from Scholes, and set their engineers to work to on the design. One of their keyboard layout changes was driven by a clever marketing idea. The Remington brand name, TYPE WRITER, could be most speedily typed if all of its letters were on the same row. Remington's salesmen used this slight bit of subterfuge to impress potential customers. Competing designs continued to be introduced over the next six decades that solved the mechanical jamming problem, and enabled faster typing. These designs ranged from the so-called "Ideal" keyboard, which placed the most commonly used letters of the alphabet -- DHIATENSOR -- in the home row (circa 1880), to the more well-known Dvorak keyboard, patented in 1932.
How much better were these other designs? During the second World War, the US Navy conducted experiments and discovered that the Dvorak layout increased typing productivity so significantly, that the payback time to retrain a group of typists was only ten days! But these designs were never successful in the marketplaceWhy would firms consistently buy an inferior product? The answer lies not in the device, but in the context of how the devices were employed. Typewriters by themselves, are unproductive objects. Their productive employment requires the presence of a skilled operator - the typist. In the late 1880's, the practice of "touch typing" (where you don't cheat and look at your fingers) was developed. And it was developed for the Remington keyboard. So while competing typewriter designers were heralding their advantages to potential typewriter purchasers, the typists were learning how to use the Remington QWERTY keyboard.
Economists describe the outcome of situations like this with terms like "system scale economies," "entry barriers," and "quasi-irreversibility of investment." Most of us would describe it more simply as: