Wednesday, April 06, 2011

52.14 Sin-ema

Helen brought up a topic during the He said, She said, VEDA project on Monday that I have very strong feelings about, and I thought I would weigh in this week with my own cinema peeves, of which I have a few. I should preface this by saying that I am sure at one time or another I have been guilty of at least some of the following things that really annoy the piss out of me. 
The following are in no particular order. 
Cinema sin 1  Texting/answering calls and or generally fapping about with your mobile phone during the film. 
This was the subject of Helen's video on Monday so I wont spend too much time on this particular issue but seriously unless your significant other/family member is either in labour or otherwise seriously ill, TURN THE DAMN PHONE OFF!  
Cinema Sin 2 Full volume conversations (and or dumb ass comments) through-out the entire film. 
I don't expect you to be completely silent during the film, even Helen and I talk to each other now and again. (although mostly we just give each other knowing looks and discuss things on the ride home) The point I'm making is that there is an acceptable volume to use with the person on either side of you, if the person on the other side of them can hear you, you are using the wrong volume.  
If you are one of those people that struggles following complicated plots (Like those of Inception, 2009's Star Trek, or Unknown ) I encourage you to do one of three things, (1) sit as far back or to a particular side in the cinema as possible (in order to limit the number of people you are likely disturb) (2) Refrain from asking questions until the credits role. or (3) Wait for the more complicated films to hit DVD, that way you have the ability to pause the film at your leisure.
 Cinema Sin 3 Loud snack/sweets packaging and or glass bottles. 
There are a number of reasons why your local cinema has numerous signs posted restricting outside food and drink. The biggest reason is that the cinema's profit margin is derived from concessions, another reason is that these products are made to be as quiet as possible the large cups and sturdy popcorn buckets are intended to minimise the rustling noises you get from bags of crisps (chips) and similar items.  
There are ways to make your Pick 'n mix bags quieter as well, If you tear off the top of the excess bag it will rustle less (Helen and I usually do this as soon as we sit down.) as you paw around trying to get at your sweets, you can do the same with the popcorn bags during the film but, it can be loud if you aren't careful. Helen and I rarely ever have popcorn at cinema but know from experience how loud the sweet sacks can be.  
I have never understood the need to sneak alcohol into the cinema; usually those that do get belligerent and disruptive and pay little to no attention to the film they paid to see. Anyone who has been in a cinema when someone drops a glass bottle is well aware of the amount of noise one makes let alone multiple bottles. If you need to be drinking to enjoy a night at the cinema, perhaps you would be happier in a bar with a big screen.  
Cinema Sin 4 Children and age appropriate films. 
I'm not implying that people with children shouldn't be able to go to the cinema. I do think that bringing your small infants and toddlers to films that are obviously not intended for them is frankly rude to other theatre goers with out children or with the presence of mind to find a baby sitter.  
Obviously if my wife and I are seeing the latest Disney/Pixar or Dreamworks animated film we expect to share the cinema with small children and the noises that go along with them, we shouldn't how ever have to share a cinema with a screaming chorus of infants when watching Unknown, or Source Code or the like.  
You may not agree with the things I have said, but really most of my Cinema Sins annoy me because of the lack of consideration for others that is displayed when they aren't heeded. I love everything about the cinema, really and truly no matter how I am feeling, I genuinely leave the theatre feeling happier. Call it escapism or mini vacations or what ever just please don't disturb the theatre patrons around you.
Random Fact: Thomas Edison, the inventor of the light bulb, was afraid of the dark.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The mother of invention.