Over Sharing.... Warning Too Much Info!!!

Why is it that we spend our entire work week waiting for the weekend so that we can take time to relax and then cram our weekends with so much crap that we never take the time. Our schedule is sort of screwed up right now, which for some cosmic reason translates to I work more. Today was my day off and I had planned on sleeping in, I didn’t. I had planned on watching movies all day and not leaving my room unless it was to masticate, (It means to chew people, sheesh!) Or use the restroom. I ended up spending most of the day running errands for people. I did find a couple of horror movies at the PX which I have been craving for a couple of days. (As I type this I’m watching the new House of Wax that came out last year.) So a friend of mine writes a blog as well, come to think of it a lot of people I know write blogs. I digress, as I was saying in one of my friends blogs she was writing about some of her most embarrassing moments and it started me thinking about how many of those I had. (Far too many for me to recount in just one posting) so I thought of a couple that were pretty high on the mortal embarrassment scale and decided to share them with all of you kind folk.

When I was in like junior high or high school. I wore sweat pants to school, I don’t remember the reason why but for some reason I had decided that it would be cool to go commando. (That’s sans underwear for those of you not in the know) That whole morning I was having a hard time keeping my pants up, some how that managed to slip my mind at lunch as I was carrying my food tray heading towards one of the tables my pants fell down around my ankles. My first reaction was to cover as much of myself as possible which entailed using the tray as a semi shield. Well unfortunately this made quite the ruckus. (When was the last time some one dropped plates at a restaurant or diner and you didn’t turn to look right away?) So everyone turned to look and there I was trying to make myself as small as possible. And of course I didn’t do that all to well. So then I was faced with the problem how do I pull up my pants and not show the world NC-17 parts... after a few second deliberation I just chose to drop the tray and pull up my sweats as fast as I possibly could. Needless to say I head about that for a very long time after it happened. And now that I think about it I had a lot more girl friends after that point as well... Go me! And now that I think about it I haven’t felt the urge to go commando either... hmmm... Coincidence I think not!
So I am a little afraid that this embarrassing moment has a little too much information, but it really is far too funny to pass up. Back in Ft Lewis we have to be at formation every morning at 6:30 in our P.T's (work out clothes) About two months after I arrived at Ft Lewis I was in one of these formations and not really paying attention to much of what is going on. (Mind you its 6:15 am on a Monday, hardly anyone is aware of what is going on) Any way my platoon Sgt is standing in front of us and giving us the information that we'll need for the day. In mid sentence he stops looks directly at me and says "Everything alright Brooks?" I was like "uh yeah, why do I have tooth paste on my face?" he said no and then very obviously looks down... (This would be the too much info part) Apparently I was more awake then I had thought. (Now mind you I am wearing shorts made out of wind breaker like material and they don't do anything to disguise certain protrusions.) For no apparent reason I had an erection that had no intention of going away... despite the now beat red face that I was sporting. To make matters worse There are two females that stand on either side of me, the one to my right made a very obvious attempt to getter a better look and started laughing hysterically (along with the other 63 people in my platoon.) On top of that for the rest of the day I was getting remarks about how I was going to be giving a class on how to "pitch a tent". I have many more, and actually a lot of them deal with embarrassing uncontrolled reactions... ah life. Hope this cheered you up



I’m a little bummed because P-Dale and Brownie went on leave this week so I wont see their smiling faces for a couple of weeks, on the bright side The Man With The Big V-8 just got back from leave today. So at least there is something to be happy about... As I was waiting to get a computer just now I came across a book by an author that I have a sort of odd friendship with. The last time I was here in Iraq he wrote an article about me and how I was spending christmas. How wild is that. so I snagged the book and I will be reading it while at work tomorrow. Smile it is a small world after all... Does this mean that Walt Disney is being cryogenically frozen under disney land???? The world may never know...

Random Movie that was way to close to my life:
So the other day one of the movies (Just Friends) I ordered from Amazon.com came in the mail, and as I was watching it I realized it was pretty much the movie version of my life. Accept for the guy playing me is way better looking than I will ever be. It is really a very funny movie about a guy and a girl that are best friends in high school and how once you enter that friend zone there is no crozzing over into the boyfriend zone. Which could really and truly be the story of my life. Except of course due to the fact that it’s a movie the guy gets the girl in the end. And in real life I get emails from exes who spend romantic four day weekends with their new beaus in Hawaii. Pout!