Monday, May 14, 2007

A Nice Little Rant

I am.


I haven’t written anything in a long while. There are a few reasons for this, I am busy but I wouldn’t say that I have been too busy. I was trying for a while to balance two different sets of friends. But more and more I am accepting the obvious fact that some people are only meant to be in your life for a short amount of time. I had mentioned in the last Blog that I had started dating someone. That uh.... well that didn’t last to long. There are a lot of reasons. Some of them I disagree with others I really can’t argue with. I was completely honest and forth coming about what I wanted in a relationship. I wasn’t dating to just date, I am looking for a wife. I think in the beginning she thought I was kidding. Little by little, she realized I was completely serious, don’t get me wrong there were other issues... But if I’m honest with myself, I knew pretty early on that even though I liked her, it wasn’t going to go any where.
It bothers me a little more than it should that I seem to have so much of a problem with relationships.... All day every day, I am face to face with multiple pregnant women, cute little newly weds, boyfriends and girlfriends that are “So in love...” (Which frequently encourages my urge to vomit, or expectorate if you will.) Yes I know I am a hypocrite, and have in fact said very similar things very early into relationships. I will point out that I am aware of it. And frankly if you don’t like it........... tough.... No one told you to read this blog. The truth is I am angry, RFG mentioned recently that I have sort have become a reclusive grump. I don’t like the fact that I am a decent guy, I am friendly I am trust worthy and loyal... and I am fricking single almost constantly... all these couples that I see every day have me constantly asking myself what they did that I didn’t. What do they have that I don’t which in turn makes me frustrated and more than a little annoyed.
I had a voice from my past reappear in my life recently, I think it is a good thing. I wasn’t really sure at first whether or not I could handle letting her back into my life. In the end it came down to the fact that people change and I wouldn’t want the last memory I had of this amazing person to be sour. She is not available for romantic entanglements, so don’t get your hopes up. I do think that if I am careful that she and I can form an awesome friendship.

Apparently this is going to be one of those blogs where I ramble on about a lot of nothing. Eh, sorry I sort of randomly decided to write this as I was sitting in my room.

Let’s see the Twerp no longer lives in our house, she sort of randomly moved out about a month ago.... seriously no big loss, showing her true colors she caused a lot of crap in her wake before she left. RFG and Rainbow Fish are doing fine. Rainbow Fishes Mother.... uh..... I don’t think she has had a nick name previously so I will call her Mother Hen as she does tend to be the matriarch of our house hold. As I was saying Mother Hen’s Sister moved in with her two kids....a boy and girl ages two and three respectively, they don’t get blog names mainly because.... well in all honesty, aside from the two year old... I’m not really a big fan... But that is a story for another day, Barbie has also moved in, due to his room in the barracks flooding and becoming all moldy and gross... I haven’t spoken or heard from the Mexican since some time in January... The last I heard he was in boston and adjusting to life as a civilian much the same as I am. I don’t want you to think that I am ungrateful for any of the things that I have been blessed with in my life... Because honestly I know that others have it worse than me... My problem is just that it should not be this hard.... look at my history with girls in just the past 18 months... It really is just kind of sad. But what ever.
In other news Things at work are going good. I am the Safety Lead... which has me constantly busy as it seems most people are more accident prone when they realize that some one else has to pay the medical bills. Grrr Arggg. I wont get started on that because I am sure it will only sound trite. I am sorry that these blogs seemed to have been pushed to the back burner I will do everything in my power to bring one of my favorite hobbies back front and center.

Spider~Man 3 is awesome and yeah that is all I have to say on that!
Talk at you soon....
Random Quote of the Blog:
So Recently among other things I have been addicted to the show NUMB3RS the basic premise is that it is a crime drama about two brothers One is a genius Mathematician and the other is a high level FBI agent... TV on DVD is a beautiful thing.
I thought this quote was appropriate.
“Charlie Eppes: Larry, something went wrong, and I don't know what, and now it's like I can't even think.
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Well, let me guess: you tried to solve a problem involving human behavior, and it blew up in your face.
Charlie Eppes: Yeah, pretty much.
Dr. Larry Fleinhardt: Okay, well, Charles, you are a mathematician, you're always looking for the elegant solution. Human behavior is rarely, if ever, elegant. The universe is full of these odd bumps and twists. You know, perhaps you need to make your equation less elegant, more complicated; less precise, more descriptive. It's not going to be as pretty, but it might work a little bit better. Charlie, when you're working on human problems, there's going to be pain and disappointment. You gotta ask yourself, is it worth it? “